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Bjust calling the kids is hard enough without the added challenge of finding a new partner. However, in the age of online dating, finding a match has never been easier. Whether you’re a mom or a dad, if you’re a single parent on the dating scene, there are plenty of potential partners who can’t wait to meet you.
As a single mum or dad, you’re not alone: 15.4% of UK families are lone parents. Your perfect match could be someone else in your place. For example, if you are a single mother, she could find herself dating a single dad. You can also find someone who simply sees you as a person and not just as a parent.
Whether you’re looking for short-term fun or a long-term relationship, get back there with these essential single parent dating tips.
1. Use dating sites
Online dating is the most popular method today for single people of all ages looking for everything from a quick hookup to marriage. You may be among the growing number of people who are igniting the first flames of a relationship over the Internet.
As a single parent, dating sites and apps can save a life. With jobs and childcare responsibilities competing for your attention, your time is precious. Online dating allows you to chat and plan with as many people as you want, whenever you have a free moment.
Another benefit of using apps and sites as a single parent dating site is that many services do the hard work for you. Telegraph dates uses a two-way matching system that makes a list of possible dates for you to browse. When you create your profile, you must meet the “ideal match” criteria. The Telegraph Dating matchmaking engine uses these criteria to find potential dates. If their criteria matches your profile, bingo, they will appear in your match list.
Of course, if you’re looking for something more casual, a free app like Tinder or Bumble can be ideal. Tinder shows single people in your area, allowing you to quickly swipe left if you’re not feeling their vibe, or swipe right if you want to chat — if they swipe right too, your conversation can begin. The USP for Bumble is that in opposite-sex couples, women have to make the first move by starting a conversation.
2. Create the perfect profile
Most dating sites require a comprehensive profile, complete with photos, a brief bio, and a list of things you’re looking for in a partner. Basically, with these profiles, the rule is that the more you invest, the more you get. If you find a spare hour during the week, get down to writing a perfect profile.
A good dating profile keeps things basic, is positive and upbeat, and offers a balance between who you are as a person and what you’re looking for in a partner. The most important thing is to be honest and open. If you’re single on a date, it’s usually a good idea to indicate that on your profile. You don’t have to talk about your kids at length or include them in any of your photos, but making it clear that they’re your top priority will help potential dates understand your lifestyle and commitments. Not everyone is looking for a relationship with someone who has kids, and ultimately it’s better for you if you can weed those people out early.
Remember, you should never feel the need to justify or make excuses for having children. Resist the urge to write things like “I have kids but…”. Instead, spend some time praising your brilliant children. Any potential partner who isn’t excited about the prospect of joining your special family is simply not worth your time.
As a final tip for your dating profile, don’t forget to post some current (and flattering) photos.
3. Ignore the Debbie Downers
Dating at any stage of life can result in a lot of unsolicited advice from friends, family members and strangers. But when you’re a single parent dating, it tends to be too fast. Married friends will try to live through you. Single friends without kids will want to drag you to bars. Perhaps most frustratingly, people will remind you of the negative consequences of trying to date as a single parent.
If there are people in your life who judge your dating life or suggest that you will struggle to find lasting love as a single parent, just don’t listen. This type of input isn’t always meant unkindly, but you shouldn’t let it influence your behavior.
As a dating single parent, you may worry about how your children will react to your new partner. But don’t let guilt stop you from starting a new chapter in your life. Of course, you need to be sensitive to your children’s feelings, so it’s important to be transparent with them and keep communication open.
When it comes to ex-partners—the mother or father of your children—you don’t need to take their dating advice or explain every detail of your love life to them, especially if they’re difficult.
That being said, it’s usually best to tell them you’re dating, just for practicality. An ex can come in handy when you need someone to watch the kids on dates.
4. Take your time
Perhaps the best advice for single parent dating is patience. Finding love should be fun and positive, but putting pressure on yourself to find someone will quickly turn the experience into something stressful and negative. Instead of rushing into something, use these apps to get to know your potential match so you can plan the perfect first date.
When you meet in person, make sure you allow enough time to make the experience stress-free. Book a babysitter for the night, clear your schedule of household chores and work commitments, and spend some time getting ready to look and feel your best. Even something as simple as going to the shops and buying a new date dress or a crisp white shirt can help boost your confidence. If the date is successful – great! But remember, there’s no pressure to rush into another unless it feels absolutely right.
It is also important to take your time later when you have established a relationship with a particular person. Introducing someone new to your children is an important step that should not be taken before you, your partner, and your children are ready.
If you are single and interested in meeting like-minded people, join Telegraph dates. With over 220,000 like-minded single people, Telegraph Dating is the best place to find romance.
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